Do you want to be positive or authentic?

August 28, 2017 Sandra Dawes

I was having a conversation with a colleague the other day and she said that she was over all the positivity talk. She said that she’d rather be authentic than positive all the time, and I agreed with her. Both notions have become buzz words lately, but they are very different.

The understanding that many people have about the law of attraction is that happy thoughts bring happy experiences and negative thoughts bring negative experiences. This has left a lot of people afraid of their negative thoughts. They feel like they have to suppress the negative thoughts that they have and not even acknowledge the negative experiences they have. This isn’t healthy or productive though is it?

Not acknowledging or thinking about the negative experiences in your life doesn’t mean they didn’t happen or that they won’t happen again. I believe that when we have negative thoughts it’s important to understand where they are coming from. They can reveal a lot about us, including what our triggers are as well as unresolved issues. If we don’t deal with these things, how do we expect to not experience them again?

Authenticity on the other hand means that you’re true to who you really are at all times. You’re not putting on a happy face because you think it’s the right thing to do, but because you’re truly happy. You’re not worried about negative thoughts or experiences because you know that this too shall pass. Authentic people are not afraid to experience the full gamut of emotions. They have the tools to ensure that they don’t become consumed by the negative thoughts and emotions that they encounter.

Authentic people are the best people to get advice or ask for an opinion. They are going to give it to you straight, even when they know that it might not be what you want to hear. Living an authentic life takes a huge load off. You know longer worry about being something you’re not. Authenticity doesn’t equal harsh, crass or rude. There’s nothing wrong with kindness and treating others with respect is still paramount. The great thing about being around authentic people is that you always know where you stand. This is a bit more challenging with people who think that they have to be positive all the time.

There’s nothing wrong with negative thoughts or experiences. What’s important is that you don’t allow them to swallow you whole. I know from experience that negativity lasts for as long as you allow it to. At some point you have to decide if you can do something about the negative thoughts and experiences you’re going through, or if they are something you have to accept.

Like the Serenity Prayer says – change the things you can and accept the things you cannot.

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